Like rehab…but without the pretty certificate

So once again, I am attempting to write a post, this time it is driven by two major factors. One, I am very bored at work and two, I am trying to get a rhythm going.

My addiction to MMRPG's continues. I, however, have not been log into the game, save for an hour on Wed. night, and I am starting to feel the effects. How many more times do I have to reload the guild forum to see that NO ONE is using it! / sigh. Another bone of contention, I am not sure what I want to do with my toons. Can’t really raid due to my work schedule and don’t feel the overwhelming desire to play. Should I, gasp, put them in storage?

On an Aculeus Upon Ordeum front, things are starting to heat up as our guild is becoming larger and we are having a harder time keeping a semblance of control.

Canadianfem is a god sent and promptly sent me an email yesterday which listed the guild’s dirt for the week. Just got another fantastic email from our Social Director. Raid drama FTW! I really need to get on tonight.

Not a Good Day

I think this picture says it all. I can't help myself. I can rationalize everything that is happening. I can tell myself, "It isn't as dark as you make it out to be." But I can't stop it. The ants are crawling up my skin, lugging massive quantities of doubt and frustrations, sadness and impotence on their dainty backs.

I can't seem to stop my mind from spiraling downward or stop it from looking around and seeing a lack of purpose or movement.

I just can't.

My Mind is the on the Verge of Firing Me.

I had a dream last night. In that dream, I am writer for a T.V. show. I am sitting around the table and a girl to my left tells me, " You haven't been producing. I told you already and they have been talked about it."

I look around the room and I can see a heavy-set man near the middle of the table. His eyes on mine, and then he looked away, weighted with disappointment and annoyance. I tried to reassure her that I had the situation under control, but she continued to insist that I was in trouble and that I hadn't been pulling my weight.

It was disconcerting.

Something pops in my mind and I start to write down an idea of a therapist who specialty are superheros, and when I tried to tell the big guy he brushed me off.

It hurt.

I have letting myself so much that I don't even want to talk to myself.

There is serious work to do.

Because I am just that consistent...

So have I been writing...not really. Thank the divine forces of this universe for allowing Albert and Valerie to start a writing group. It is sorely need.

On another note, I am in the middle of writing a prompt for the day when, as usual, I became sidetracked by a nifty website that creates custom signatures for your WoW toons. Yes, ladies and Gents, you too can display your virtual avatar's stats, name and rank to all of the WoW obsessed.

Click here to go the site. Here they are! My lovely, girly toons!

On the road again...

It is funny how you seem to come back around to the things you once left behind. I have a habit of that, going around in circles. How strange we are, thinking we are actually moving forward; instead it is more-moving sideways, then around. The circumference may be wider, the distance longer and the view better, but in the end you end up intersecting with an old circle you haven't seen in years.

Weird, eh?

Sad World...

I looked at my blog yesterday, just to see where I had left it since I hadn’t updated in a little over a month, and I was surprised to see a comment under my last post. A comment, someone had left something to say about my page. It hadn’t happened before and the small thrill of seeing that tiny 1 next to ‘comments’ made my fingers itched. So I clicked on the link and nothing…the blogger site was down. This morning I tried again and this time the linked worked. I started to read the comment, something like…I think your site is cool…nice so far…check this website out…What? Why would I want to do that…but since I am a total moron, I followed the link to some dating service.

Spam strikes again.

Assholes.